There have been times when I have started a task, or a project, full of confidence and enthusiasm. There have been times too when, despite my best efforts and sincere commitment, my interest and concentration waned and I began to wonder exactly what I have taken on. Have I understood what is involved in the first place? Have I overestimated my abilities? Have I reached for something beyond myself. I suspect that this is true for many of us, it’s part of human experience.

This was true for the disciples too in the early stages of Jesus’ ministry, indeed throughout the whole of His earthly ministry. The story of the disciples interactions with Jesus, even during the time after His resurrection are full of misunderstandings and misinterpretations. It is only after the descent of the Holy Spirit at Pentecost that things come fully into focus. It is only then that their trust and confidence in Jesus comes to full maturity. Doubt and misunderstanding are gone, they literally lay their lives on the line for what they finally know to be true. They move from being disciples - those who follow, to apostles - those who are sent.

We see some of this early ambiguity in Sunday's gospel. Immediately prior to Sunday’s events is the feeding of over 5,000 people. At the time the disciples are still developing their relationship with Jesus. In Sunday’s gospel Jesus is not with them. Without Jesus I wonder how their conversation went. What did they make of the miraculous meal? Was it some kind of magic trick, how was it done? Was Jesus doing it only to win people over? Was there some kind of other kind of meaning, such as a prophetic sign found in the Jewish scripture? Jesus provides no answers, they are alone with their speculations. They see Jesus doing things which are clearly incredible and unexplainable. Who is Jesus? What is Jesus?

The time for speculation is soon over as they encounter a storm on the lake. The Sea of Galilee is 13 miles long and 8 miles wide, at its deepest it is 140 feet. Strong winds there are not uncommon, as are accidents. It is the early hours of the morning; the fourth watch is between is between 3 and 6 in the morning. Perhaps they have made this journey many times before. What should be a simple trip is becoming a nightmare where their lives are at risk. Added to that is a mysterious figure approaching them walking on the churning sea.

It is Jesus who takes the initiative. He is the centre of stillness in the midst of apprehension and terror. He uses words that will become so familiar to them and to us to “do not be afraid”. Peter’s response is not as straightforward as it seems “Lord, if it is you”, there is a seed of doubt within his heart, yet, impulsive as he is, Peter steps out. Try to imagine how it must feel to find yourself walking on stormy water, it must have felt amazing, but his confidence vanishes, his concentration too; fear grips his heart; he loses his focus on Jesus; he sinks like a stone. Perhaps as we do in the life of faith, there are times when we bask in a warm feeling of consolation, a sense of God’s presence, times when we easily find shelter within the Sacred Heart of Jesus. There are times for all of us when we are battered by events around us, times when we feel that we about to be overwhelmed. Times of desolation. Times when we are adrift, alone.

But Jesus always walks with us, ofttimes invisible but truly present. He is really and truly present in his very body, blood, soul and divinity in the stillness of the Holy Eucharist, where he unites his divinity and humanity with weakness and vulnerability. He does this because he knows that our lives are often a succession of storms – one after the other. He is with us always, just as he promised.

Listen today for the words of Jesus to Peter in your hearts and souls, “Why do you doubt? “Courage! It is I! Do not be afraid.”

As always, please accept an assurance of my daily prayers for your needs and intentions.

God bless and keep you.

Fr Chris